Sunday, February 22, 2015

excerpt from my ya novel

so i thought i'd do a little excerpt from my novel here. it's about a seventeen year old girl who has been abused her whole life by her mother. the story is her dealing with the fallout of being placed in a foster home and having to look at her life from a different angle.

hope you like it!

The Shape of Violet

Chapter One

            On the fifth day Mother came to see me while the lady from the state stood in the doorway and the cop stood by my bed, arms folded, feet apart. Glaring at everyone. Mother looked elegant and cool, her hair in a smooth bun, small diamonds in her ears, nails perfect. She was always perfect.
            Why was I shaking? Why did I feel frozen, inside and out?
            Shut up, traitor brain. Breathe. Just breathe. Pay attention, I told myself. Always wool-gathering, she would tell me. Too stupid to know my whole life was about to fall off a cliff.
            I teetered on the edge of the bed. Mother stopped two feet away when the cop held his hand out. She ignored him. I could smell her perfume, White Shoulders, an awful sickening smell. She wore it like armor. I stared at the scuffed linoleum beyond her left elbow.
            "So," she said.
            My shoulders hunched up. I knew I would say something I'd regret. "Don't you want me?"         My stomach clutched at my inanity.
            She crossed her arms. "Hmm. Tough question."
            I looked up. Her face, cold and hard, close but so distant. "Mother?"
            She shook her head. "No, my dear. No more. I'll leave you alone if you'll leave me alone."
            "You'll be fine."
            She turned, left. Her polished, confident walk took her away from me, like she wouldn't be leaving anything behind. I listened to her heels clicking against the floor until there was nothing but me. Alone. I heard a rushing, water-like sound in my ears.
            The state lady cleared her throat, shuffled her feet. She smelled of nicotine, hair a frizzled brass. She touched my arm but I pulled away. She hesitated, mumbled something I couldn't understand before leaving. The cop glanced at me. I didn't let him catch my gaze. Then he left, too.
            I sat there, homeless. I'd always been afraid, but now it felt like a full body burn, first degree. Even my skin wasn't safe.

that's all of chapter one. it's a really short chapter.

what do you think? 

hope you're all having a fabulous weekend!

Thursday, February 19, 2015

intention word for 2015


this year is going to be all about my art. i'm going to draw more.

by alan m. clark

i'm going to paint again.

by me
i'm going to write *every day* and this year i'm going to start my earnest search for an agent.

i'm going to make more jewelry.

piece i made for my magical sister

earrings i made for myself
i'm going to read art books and novels and poetry.

i'm going to do great nail art at work.

nails by me
and maybe, just maybe, i will find myself again.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

time flies

so, okay, my dears. it's been *forever.* right? so sorry.


my little fur-baby died. oh, nene, how i miss you still!

notice her little red rimmed eye there? allergies.

she died from liver failure on memorial day, 2014. my heart broke that day. she was my shadow, my joy. she trusted me completely. there will never be another cat who will own my heart as nene did. oh, i loved her so very much.

then in september of last year i had surgery on my spine--c3 through c7 were fused (they're in the neck) and c4 and c5 got a nice plate with screws 'cause they were all wibbly-wobbly. oy! the pain. i'm finally getting some strength back, but it's supposed to take a year to get better.

i was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. searching for answers there. still looking for viable treatments.

and now, for the good stuff!

i'm drawing and painting again! yay, yay, yay!

and (drumroll, please) i'm working on my YA novel again, and started a new one. so exciting to be writing again.

i've pulled back from jewelry some, just because i lost a lot of usability in my left arm before the surgery. it's slowly coming back, but there's been some permanent nerve damage and i don't have a whole bunch of fine motor skills, like i used to have. even my right arm was damaged some. so. rethinking things. hence, the delving back into drawing, painting, and writing.

and now, for the really big news:

last i left, i announced i was going to become a nail tech. and i *have.* i'm working at Sally's Salon of Style. i *love* it. yay, yay, yay!!!

we're actually in the process of moving to a new place, where i'll get my own room and get to help with the decorating. (!) my boss is *amazing* and so supportive. oh, i'm a lucky girl.

wishing you all the best. <3 p="">